Growing up, I have definitely known the phrase, “It takes a village to raise a child.”
Looking back, I smile at the amount of influence other people have had on my life. There is a mix of not so great influence in there; however, I am grateful to have experienced some sweet older people lead me.
The more and more I think about it, it really does take a village to raise a person. We are designed and created for community. We are meant to know sweet relationship with one another. Community can be known on a friendship level, sports teams, small groups, churches, parent groups, office environments, and the many alike.
We are made to know and be known.
One of the greatest gifts I have had in my life is the gift of mentors. I grew up fast as a teenager. Tragedy has a way of providing a catalyst for maturing way faster than the “normal” rate. I needed help. I needed people in my life who were steps ahead of me – guiding me to move forward.
We are not meant to aimlessly wander through life.
As a teenager, I needed parent like figures to teach me life skills and warnings. As a college kid, I needed older voices in the form of wisdom and gentle direction. As a young 20-something, I needed those older voices to speak into questions of wrestling identity, vocation, and encouragement.
Now, as a early 30-something, I love the voices that speak into character, relationships, purpose, and refinement.
I honestly think that mentoring is undervalued. I love mentoring young adults and college age kids. I love pouring into the lives of others who are wrestling with past seasons of life I have walked through.
We need each other.
I currently have a handful of older faith-strong women who have walked with me for many of those above chapters in my life. I can’t tell how invaluable those relationships are for me. Especially in a season where everything is transitional and new, it is so refreshing to have conversations where I am known; where there is history.
I could honestly sit at the feet of these women all day and just listen. I know I always walk away a better me from those rich conversations.
We all have so much to offer. I want to encourage you to think about someone older to connect with that can love on you and speak into your life. There is nothing like it.
Also think about someone younger who you can love on and walk with through their season of life. It’s life changing for you both!
What has been your mentoring experience?
Yes, THIS!! It totally takes a village. I have had discussions with Christians who adamantly insist that it does NOT take a village, but that the responsibility of raising a child lies solely with the parents. Of course that is the strongest and most important element, but right behind that comes the community. (As a disclaimer, I don’t know what Hillary has to say on the matter; maybe someday I will read her book just to find out how she has influenced the understanding of this saying) I do know that the happiest, strongest, most stable people in my life have come out of strong communities with lots of interaction and guidance from not only the parents. Mothers are called to be mothers. I will mother children who are not my own as needed.
It all goes back to the fact that we are all in this life together and we should learn from each other as much as we can.
Great post, Tracee!
I grew up in a setting where everyone bought up each others kids, I had countless “aunts” and “uncles”, us kids were constantly in and out of each others’ homes. The older kids were big siblings for us younger ones and looked out for us, and the younger ones looked out for the babies. In other words the village really did raise us… there was always someone to talk to. But that all changed when we moved from that community when I was 10.
After that I can’t say I’ve known a true mentoring relationship, and I crave it, and I’ve tried to seek it out… but failed.I guess moving about A LOT means no-one has ever really known me, known my history, known my whole story, other than my parents, and now as I’m older even they have missed out big sections of my journey. But wherever I go I try to seek out older and wiser people than me, and I try to soak up their wisdom, learn from their experiences, and bathe in their faith. Sometimes I find those people, and other times I don’t.
I’ve also been a mentor for several teen girls,and my is it a hard, heart shattering, tiring, thing to be sometimes and sometimes it’s full of joy, and laughter, and love. But oh it’s so worth it, to see them move forward, to see them grow, to see them understand truth and freedom.
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